dearandy

Why do you have to be so chivalrous? No one treats me that way...and I can't find you.

Dearbestfriendwhoisignoringme

I'm not going to play mind games with you. I'm taking what you say at face value and if that's not what you really mean, then that's you're issue. Don't guilt me, I asked you, be assertive and tell me what you feel. Don't dance around shit and hope that I can read your thoughts, because, newsflash, I can't. 

I would just rather call mine 'beauty marks' :]

aS SICK AS IT IS, i'M GLAD THAT MY BOYFRIEND WATCHES PORN. sO i DON'T HAVE TO FEEL SO GUILTY DOING SO. 

Slacking

Once you get past the guilt, life is love.

ha. ha. ha.....

togotoyouthgroup

or to not go to youth group... that is the question.

:] Our Signs :D

so thats what all the fuss is about.,.

definerelapse

because I took to many of what I'm allowed to take, what I'm supposed to take, but more than the amount that I'm prescribed... And it felt good. Help.

ithoughtilovedyouthen

dearboys

I want someone to love, accept, cherish me for the person I am right at this very second. Not the person that I've been or the person that I could potentially become. Just me, right now, take it or leave it. 

But no one seems to want her...

did i shave my p***y for this? effing awesome.

and no, you don't have any right to tell me what i want and what i have always wanted, you don't know me.

I'm still you're number 2 and I'm sick and tired of trying to live up to peoples expectations of me. I just want someone to take me for me and just... put me first...

deargod

thank you for jake:) i like him.

I am going to shoot myself... Online classes were supposed to be easier but no, you miss like 5 questions and you fail the whole fuckin thing. awesome. I just wanna go out and be with Jake and be angry and vent and have him make me laugh.... I don't wanna be a senior right now. It's to much work and I mean honestly, why do my parents throw such a big fit when no one is going to remember my AP environmental science grade in a year anyways?

On the down side of things... I busted my car's grill again. Stupid parking blocks... that's what did it. I never know how far up to go... fucking A. Hopefully I can get some money before dad notices it. FML

I love how nothing can go right all the time. It's either my social life sucks or my school life sucks or my family life sucks or my emotional life sucks. Why is it so difficult to find balance? What really matters here?

I don't want him I don't want HIM and I don't want Him. I want her.. and she probably doesn't want me. She's the one who I could open my heart to.. who gave me butterflies... a person I saw the best of myself in. Her all of her moments were my few shining moments, she shines all the time. I don't think she understands what I feel for her... I care for her. I want to support her and make her laugh and cry and smile and I wanna roll over in the morning and see her lying next to me because that is safety, that is a morning without anxiety.

howaboutihave

both.

Something Corporate "Konstantine"

dearkatie

please be a safe infatuation.

Maybe that would explain it... 

Just say thank you to whatever greater power gave you this hot mess and walk away...

But you're just a boy
You don't understand
And you don't understand, oh
How it feels to love a girl
Someday you wish you were a better man
You don't listen to her
You don't care how it hurts
Until you lose the one you wanted
'Cause you're taking her for granted
And everything you had got destroyed
But you're just a boy

-Beyonce

Eminem - Love You More

the beauty of doing nothing... but watching YouTube videos... mindlessly for... going on 4 hours..

I know someday you'll have a beautiful life 
I know you'll be a sun 
In somebody else's sky 
But why 
Why 
Why can't it be 
Why can't it be mine 

-Pearl Jam

Dear Brain,
Why do you have to be so goddamn different from everyone else?

dearfatfeeling

Please go away. I worked out, hardly ate anything today, and now I'm drinking my laxative. Please, just spare me for tonight.

dearlukethisisreallykillingmebuti

Can't let go of you... 

ha.

disconected

everyonelooksbeautifulinthedark

So... I guess it's just kiss and make up again. We can't fight if our minds are elsewhere... I hate to put a deadline on a relationship but I'd give it another week and reevaluate. He said he was going to change, starting "right now" as I was laying in his arms. Yet he also said that last weekend... I guess I'm just going to take it at face value and believe that he's changing this time.

And then theres. HIM. HE, is going to be the death of me. I hadn't talked to him for... oh, I'd say a good month or so, but last night I found out that he blocked my number. Awesome. So, I emailed him because I'm a masochist.. and fuck.. I can't do this. He's killing me but I just want more and more of him... He's so dangerous, the relationship is so abusive, manipulative, unrealistic, and full of lies. The worst part is, he knows that he has me. At least boyfriend is still at the point where I manipulate him... but HE, is to far gone. HE knows all my tricks, tactics, and secrets-And we've never met. Ironic. The one who has hurt me the most has never laid a hand on me.

So if we don't have love...

we are dying

we have given up

we are dead.

Let's pretend. It's better that way. 

You know that feeling? When you’re just waiting. Waiting to get home, into your room, close the door, fall into bed, and just let everything out that you kept in all day. That feeling of both relief and desperation. Nothing is wrong. But nothing is right either. And you’re tired. Tired of everything, tired of nothing. And you just want someone to be there and tell you it’s okay. But no one’s going to be there. And you know you have to be strong for yourself, because no one can fix you. But you’re tired of waiting. Tired of having to be the one to fix yourself and everyone else. Tired of being strong. And for once, you just want it to be easy. To be simple. To be helped. To be saved. But you know you won’t be. But you’re still hoping. And you’re still wishing. And you’re still staying strong and fighting, with tears in your eyes. You’re fighting.

I set my sails for a new direction
But the wind got in my way
I changed my course
But my definition of change
Just ain't the same

I'm gonna sit right here
Stay away from there
I'm gonna make pretend
I just don't care...
-Eric Church

I just ate- Now my web piercing hurts... New diet technique? I think yes. 

Options for Tonight

1. Sit at home. Wallow in self-pity and eat my feelings.
2. Go out with Tay... but.. I can't be destructive with her :( 
3. Wait for my faggot boyfriend to call me and ask me to hang out because he misses me oh so much! 

Yeah, the last one isn't gonna happen. 

I'm betting I end up doing a mixture of 1 and 2. 

I look like shit, I feel like shit, shit, I must be a piece. 

A penny for my thoughts-oh no, I sell 'em for a dollar, they're worth so much more after I'm a gonner and then maybe then you'll hear the words I've been singing. Funny when you're dead, people start listenin'. 

Fuckin' awesome. You forgot about me again... Have fun. 

alone

Dear Luke...

The more you put me through
The more it makes me wanna come back to you
You say you hate me, I just love you more
You don't want me, I just want you more.

fuckfuckfuckfuckfuck

-its Friday... lets attempt to act normally; and no, normal doesn't entail sitting at home watching porn all night. 

'"Cuz I hate you, do you hate me? 
Good, 'cuz you're so fuckin beautiful when you're angry."
-Eminem

I feel like starting a fight with someone other than myself.